Get: Elastic Bands

Gwynnie's personal trainer, aka She Who Shall Not Be Named, has gone on record saying that Gwyneth uses elastic bands to keep fit. Obviously, Gwyn Gwyn has been looking stellar in her line of goop basics so her elastic band trick is clearly working. But as they say (and by they, I mean the Jews, or was it the gays...or maybe it was Ziggy, who I'm pretty sure was both...), great minds think alike. So it's no surprise that I, like Goopy, have too recently discovered the most divine way in which to keep my clothes fitting like a glove without having to do all that pesky warming up and cooling down and leaving the couch for anything but pee breaks and peanut M&Ms during an entire weekend long marathon of Dance Moms. It's also an elastic band. I put them in my pants. And of course, to complete the ensemble, I pair them with the chicest over-sized kitty tee that I got from a vendor in Chinatown. It says "I Don't Like Mondays." Too funny, right? I mean, do any of us enjoy Monday? ah-ha ah-ha ah-hahaha. Long story short, I've basically given up on life. Either that or I've become a hipster. But you know, I'm still not entirely sure they are two different things at this point.